Duke Nukem

Duke Nukem

Gadgeteer Junkie


About Me

Age 57
Gender Male

The details of my life are quite inconsequential ... Very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a 15-year-old French prostitute named Chloé with webbed feet. My father would womanize; he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes, he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament ... My childhood was typical: summers in Rangoon ... luge lessons ... In the spring, we'd make meat helmets ... When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds — pretty standard, really. At the age of 12, I received my first scribe. At the age of 14, a Zoroastrian named Vilmer ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum — it's breathtaking ... I suggest you try it.

You gotta know that I'm the original Dr. Evil as I didn't spend six years in evil medical school to be called 'Mister', thank you very much!


My Job

Profession General menace to society

Ya right, disclosure of most of my best work will be available in about 75 years.


My Products and Knowledge

Products Cerberus, EMX, HAT, Holey Board, Hydra, Lynx, Medusa, Mountaineer, Raptor, Reaper, Cream, Spider, Spider II
Hardware Good experience. I understand sensors and buses. I'm capable of extending hardware. I can read full schematics and solder.
Software Excellent experience. I can plan, design and program a complete application for a final product. I can implement design patterns, build small applications and perform device communication. I understand object-oriented concepts.

Links I Like

I haven't added any yet

My Activity

Registered Nov. 21, 2011
Last login Apr. 27, 2017 at 8:43 PM EDT
Forum View my posts (2,234)
Codeshare View my entries
Rank Legend
Experience 66,831
Points 53,540

Recent